My last blog was about three steps to getting what you want.

The problem is we don’t really know what we want. Have you ever had the experience of achieving something significant, or getting something big, and then feeling flat? Like perhaps that wasn’t it after all.

So what do you really want? Why do you want that job? That car? That house? That relationship? That holiday? That meal? That experience?

My friend Wayne Clayton has some deep thinking about this over a number of years, decades actually. He says that fundamentally we are driven by how we feel, and there are five feelings we are seeking:

Safe
Well
Connected
Worthy
Free

It’s a pretty big idea. And I think he’s onto something. We want the job to feel more safe. We want the car to feel more worthy. We want to holiday to feel free. Maybe. Or some combination.

I think it’s worth considering if Wayne is right, and if this is what you really want. And then considering if how you’ve designed your life is the best way to get that.