It’s not often I’ll give other parents feedback on their parenting. Unsolicited feedback is generally not a good idea … and when it’s about parenting it can be a recipe for disaster.

But there is some behaviour that you just can’t step over.

So I approached the family in question, sitting at a picnic table next to the playground. “Is this your boy?” I asked. The woman looked suddenly apprehensive (as you would). “Yes.”

“I just wanted to say congratulations on raising an exceptional young man. When no-one was looking he stepped aside on the flying fox to let a seven-year old girl (my daughter Scarlett, so of course I was watching from the distance) go first. He didn’t need to do it. It was his turn. But he showed exceptional kindness, courtesy, and manners. Thank you.”

By this time both his mum and his aunt had teared up. As I was leaving I heard the aunt say to young Mitchell “As your family, hearing that makes us all so proud.”

The lesson for me in that is how powerful it is to catch people out doing something right. As a mentor, and as a leader, I can be really good at seeing what’s missing. Noticing the gap. Pointing out what we could do better.

I reckon I could spend a bit more time noticing what’s working and pointing that out too.